Another way to keep things
fresh is to not allow anything to become rigidly `gender specific’, and to
avoid a strict 50/50 attitude toward responsibilities. In the case of the
latter, there will always be times when one or the other partner will be
carrying a greater percentage of the work load. This is natural, and if you
truly love each other there should be no evidence of a `balance sheet’ where
the division of responsibilities is concerned.
Where gender specificity is
concerned, there will always be certain things which one or the other
handles on a more or less regular basis. However, when those things become
"woman’s work" or "man’s work", and neither wants to cross the `gender
barrier’, tensions and resentments are destined to occur needlessly.
My suggestion here is to do
whatever needs to be done, regardless of who’s "job" it is, because it needs
to be done. Think of it in terms of what is of most benefit to the both of
you -- on behalf of both of you as a couple.
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The sooner
the chores are out of the way _ the sooner you’ll have time to
spend time relaxing with each other and enjoying quality time together.
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Don’t wait to be asked; just do it
because you love her or him. It will be appreciated, and will add to your store
of "gift wrapped memories". When your partner does something out
of the ordinary for you, show your appreciation for it. Never allow a
gesture or an effort to go unappreciated.
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There’s no substitute for the
words "Thank You". By showing consistent appreciation, your partner will not
feel taken for granted, and you will always be reminded that your partner’s
efforts are important to you -- ergo, you will be far less likely to begin
taking his or her efforts for granted.
Even the most mundane task is
more enjoyable when you know it’s appreciated by someone important to you.
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Life will throw a curve at you
